Much (March)

I assume this as my first March's post cos the previous one is just about a statement.

I'm gonna talk the life of mine in March. As I mentioned, I can barely remember things now, so I'm recalling with the photos I have. Sorry. (people don't mind though)

First of all, our class be the facilitator for the History's talk in my school. Teacher said she wants to let every teachers in my school that have negative opinions on our class change their minds. Thanks Puan Norziah! Hope we didn't disappoint you. We love you. <3

However, we had some fun despite getting bored in the hall. Heehee. :3

I captioned this as "cos concentrate on a talk is too mainstream" on Wechat.

During the break, we celebrated Rasyidah's and Syahir's coming birthday~ Thanks Puan Norziah for making us these cakes. We love you again! The cakes were too "sweet" for us. Thank you! But I didn't managed to take a photo of it. /.\

Rasyidah and one of the cake~ 

Dude, thanks for being this good to me these years. 

Let's proceed. The day before my exam started, Jimmy brought me to Gasing Hill for hiking. This was the first hike of my life, seriously. I enjoyed it, the tiredness of climbing walking up and the stiffness of getting down, I would remember it. Thank you Jerry~ And it showed how I didn't care about my exam. 

Me in the middle of the hanging bridge.

That's why I mentioned "walking" up.

A clearer me. :3

The hanging bridge without me. :3

Another stairs again.

And I've struggled for studying last minutes for my exam. I still don't know my results yet. And I'm not expecting to get any good results. My Malay got 60 and thanks Puan Haslinda for giving me another three marks. And it went pretty well. Thank god. 

We went to Kajang's New Era College for a Chinese talk. I really learnt and realised a lot in the talk. I knew people last time weren't easy. They fought for Chinese's Education and everything for us, the Chinese. As a Chinese, we learn't Chinese doesn't mean I don't love Malaysia. My hometown isn't China, is MALAYSIA! I don't really know how to describe the talk and rewrite everything, cos there are a lot I have to write down if I do that. Just see the photos of us. :3 

The group photo of us. :3 

The view from the hall. 

We've reached Kajang station! 

Random~

It was made by College's students.

Actually I purposely post this to wish him a HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY! 

Another group photo of us~

The right side view from the hall.

This is the first group photo of us actually.

Cos we are too swag to sit in a hall. :3

The left side view. 

Just too nice. Don't you think? :3 We enjoyed ourselves! Thanks to Teacher Lee and friends! You guys made my day! <3

And finally, came to my Undang Test! I got 42/50 and I think it's really my luck. Thank god again. I thought I would fail at the first place because I studied last minute, again. Congrats to Ying Ying, cos she passed hers too! We were just too lucky!

Then I went to Vzai's shop. He gave me a phone case, cos I've been asking for a few days. Thanks gor! 

I love it. 

Actually I had a lot of ideas and feelings to be expressed, just I didn't take it down, so I couldn't share it here. I will try my best to write down everything in my mind. 

Yes, we're still waiting for MH370 to come back. Please, no matter what, come back. Your family and friends are waiting here. We love you. The rain brought away the haze and I pray so that it can bring back you to us soon. 

Too much of worries these days. 

God, I know it's all your plan, please help me through it. 

And lastly, let's pray for MH370.

We know,

There can be miracles, 

when you believe,

though hope is frail.

Who knows that miracles, 

you can achieve,

when you believe,

somehow you will,

you will when you believe.

Compliments make I feel...

"Sometimes a compliment is not a thing you should be proud of."

Is the statement true? I would give a "yes". 

A compliment sometimes really make me feel stress and kinda tired of it. You know why? Cos people expect you to be as good as they praised you in the last time. 

For example, 

"You're so smart!" from a teacher. He/She will start to expect you to answer every questions given. If you can't answer, he/she will be like "what? I thought you are very smart!" or maybe feel a little disappointed. It's not a good feeling when I disappoint someone.

The next one,

"You're so handsome!" from a friend or a stranger. I have no idea why they say this. Flattering? Flatter for what? To catch that "handsome" guy's attention? Yes, maybe, a girl does this to let that guy feel that she got attracted to him and maybe they will start to be in a relationship. Who knows? Then this would be the REAL reason behind the compliment. 

If a girl receives a compliment on how pretty she is from a girl, maybe she just want to get close to you, cos maybe you're really pretty and you have a lot of fans. She does this to catch your fans' attention so that she can get a little fans. 

All those above are my own opinions. I'm just sharing my thoughts. 

Although sometimes I think compliments are not good, but it's quite good in some ways. A praise from the others will make me feel good and maybe it will increase my self-esteem, I guess. It's good to be praised!

Can barely remember THINGS

Stopped writing for quite a long time. I tried to write but failed cos I didn't know what to write and I was in the 'right' mood to write, I supposed. Writing requires a lot of things. I don't mean the physical stuffs, but the mentally ones. wtf am I crapping?  I guess this post of mine will be more on what I've did in the few passed weeks.

Hmm.... Where should I start? Too much to say but too little words in my mind to describe. And truth be told, nowadays I am being quite soulless and heartless, I can hardly remember things just as my title stated, I can't remember my feelings and thoughts. THIS IS SO NOT GOOD.

Aha, I went to Mid Valley with my friends to watch "The Journey". It's a superb awesome, amazing, bombastic, bravo, etc., movie!

"The Journey" (一路有你）is a 2014 Malaysian Chinese film directed by Chiu Keng Guan. (rumours say that it took 3 years for the filming)

This is the plot of "The Journey" :

The Journey tells about Uncle Chuan (Frankie Lee), a conservative father with a rigid set of rules. When her daughter, Bee (Joanne Yew) returns home after spending most of her formative years in England with a fiance, Benji (Ben Pfeiffer) in-tow, Uncle Chuan refuses to give his blessing. With cultural differences and language barrier that could potentially damage the union between Benji and his loved one, he feels that something must be done quick. Uncle Chuan reluctantly allows them to marry but on one condition — the wedding ceremony has to be in the traditional way. Despite their lack of understanding towards one another, Benji and Uncle Chuan embark on a nationwide journey to hand-deliver wedding invitations to the latter’s childhood friends. Throughout the journey, the two learn valuable lessons about accepting each other’s differences.

I copied this from wikipedia since I have no idea on writing it. The Journey has officially become the highest grossing local production ever in Malaysia's Box Office record, holding a huge gross of RM12.92 million.

*Congrats* *Clap* *Fireworks*

I'm proud of it and hope it can hold a better gross. 

The only girls among us. 

The robocop statue(?).

G E E K.

Isn't it cool? *smirks*

Want to watch the trailer of "The Journey" (一路有你)? Click here.
There are a lot of beautiful quotes from the movie, but I can't really remember and recall. Shit!

Our movie was on 5.45pm, so before that we went for some games and drinks and desserts. We went to Galactic Laser. It was better than I expected. I thought it would be bored but thank god it ended up quite fun, just the stuffs ran out of battery spoiled my game. wtf. I recommend you all to try it but it's quite expensive, for me, cos it used up RM25 just for 10 minutes.

Then we went to Tong Pak Fu to rest ourselves and had some drinks. We chatted quite a long time there.

12 of us again. *smirks*

Me and CC. 

Come, let's selfie~

I ran to their table while RS was not around. :3

Credit to CC.

After movie then we wandered for a while cos we have no idea where to have our dinner and we ended up to have our dinner at Burger King. lame - -. But who cares? And finally, we were all tired and went back home with every parts of our body fatigued.

Last Saturday, my school organised "Road Run 2014" and I was determined to get into top 50 since the medals will be given to the top 50 for the passed few years. Unfortunately, the medals will only be given to the top 30 this year and I only managed to get into between 31st to the 40th place. God damn it. Fine, then. I have nothing to say, just accept the fact that I'm not good enough.

Me and KL before the road run. 

Last of my school life.

Not the first 30 finisher.

It's okay. 

Congrats to those who managed to get into the first 30.

YOLO~ wtf?

My house'se wifi spoiled for a few days and planned to give up and cut the line, but at last they came and fixed it. I thought I can focus on my SPM after this but why you don't let me?! let's just continue surfing the net.

Seriously, I don't know what to write now. I have a lot of homework that I postponed and I think I should have get started now. Exam is coming and the preparation of mine is totally 0%. BEH TZE CHYI, come on!! PLEASE, work harder!

Here are some random photos taken by me, most of them are not edited. :)

Credit to Aida. Proud to be one of them. 

While waiting the train. 

In the progress of colouring my Pikachus.

Done. I have to admit that I have no talents in arts.

Rose(s) that my parents got from a wedding dinner of their friend's son.

I took it from the book of "The Journey" that I found in the MPH Bookstore.

Love. ♥

The Little Things

The Little Things

I baked muffins for the young man who cut a portion 

of my yard and would not take any money.

He said how good they tasted.

I went to the grocery store for an older neighbor couple 

during a snowstorm when they were afraid to drive.

They were grateful for the food.

I took a special pastry to the gentleman in the neighborhood

on his 90th birthday when he was not expecting it.

He smiled and said he liked sweets.

I prepared lunch for the carpet-layers as they worked in the heat

and had forgotten to bring lunch with them.

They ate like hungry children.

I took drinks to the trash men on a hot afternoon in summer heat 

when they looked so exhausted from the humidity.

They drank it like men never having water.

I took homemade chicken noodle soup, crackers, and cheese

on a lady in an auto accident, temporarily confined to a wheelchair.

She liked the taste of something she had not prepared.

I send a special card to a lady in the neighborhood

who was facing her husband's first birthday after his passing.

She thanked me for being sensitive.

I had a "thank you" lunch for the ladies who had helped with food

after my knee surgery and the following convalescence.

They had a good time of fellowship.

I baked brownies for the plumbers I always called with problems 

when they did not charge me for a service call.

They appreciated the recognition.

I spent the afternoon with a friend who had lost a close family member

when she had no one else with whom to share her hurts.

She felt the freedom to cry and felt better.

I sent a special card to a lady whom I had known for years

when she faced the first Christmas without her husband.

She knew that I truly understood her situation.

I stopped and thanked the custodian at the busy local hospital

when he was mopping the dirty footprints from the hall.

He stood up straighter and seemed so pleased.

I prepared a meal for a friend who works many long, hard hours

when she came home weary from being on her feet.

We enjoyed the meal together and talked.

I thanked the checkout lady at the grocery store cash register

when she totaled my bill and gave me change.

She was pleased that someone appreciated her.

I read a poem by Sandy Ezrine when she shared her thoughts 

about not waiting to do the big things for others.

I was a better person for it.

~Carol Goodman Heizer

I typed this just to share bout the story of the writer. I read it from 20th Anniversary Edition of "Chicken Soup for the Soul". She tells people that every little things you do may make the others and you happy. Giving a card, saying "thank you", spending your time with your friend, etc., can cheer the people around and you up or smile a little.  

Unanticipatedly, I had a feeling of writing down the things that make me happy. 

These are the things that make me happy today :

Apologised to E-Lyn's dad cos I was late.

(he did not get mad)

Spoke to teachers with great ardor.

(they taught me everything they knew)

Understood Add Maths easily. 

(but I'm not sure that I can do it without referring) 

Finished my homework earlier.

 (while the others were still rushing to finished it)

Brought my "Chicken Soup for the Soul" to school.

(intended to finish a few topics of it)

Planned for an outing with friends.

(decided to go Midvalley this Sat)

Had fun teasing friends.

(sorry and hope you guys wouldn't mind)

Learnt a new vocabulary.

("ardor" is the word)

Took a almost 3 hours nap.

(I'm a pig)

Did not waste my time on waiting my dinner.

(just a few minutes and I got mine and brother's dinner)

I think I might left out some of them, but these were enough for me to smile or feel a little bit happy. (or perhaps I'm an optimist?) Thank god for giving me this chance to feel happy.

Nevertheless, there were something that made me felt a little depression in the night. Brandon got pissed off cos I assumed that he was busy. wtf?! But it's okay, I know people, people get bored of people easily. 

A month back, we were having fun chatting, talking on the phone and sharing the thoughts, but now, everything has changed. He will never talk to me first, and I'm afraid to take the first step, cos I don't want to interrupt him and let him feel getting irritated. And he ended up getting pissed off eventually. He said he doesn't like my negative thinking, he doesn't like me assuming him that he was busy. Okay, fine now. 

I sneered(?) a little and finally I figured out one thing:

He got bored of me. 

I know he won't read this or even if he does, I don't mind.

You will do whatever to please someone you like and you won't get pissed off even he/she does something you thought you can't accept at the first place.

BUT, if you will get pissed off when someone you dislike does anything, ANYTHING. Anything he/she does will irritates you and you feel like punching him/her in the face. 

And now I know, even a message like "it's okay if you're busy, you can tell me after your exams." will pissed someone off. 

I think I have to get rid of him and never go back, but I promised him to stay with him no matter what. I don't want to break the promise. Brandon, can you don't do this to me again? 

And just to share, I received my fish eye lens, like finally! 

First selfie using my macro lens. :B

It was taken with my macro lens. By the way, please ignore the background, it's extremely messy.

It's hard to notice the difference of the photos between the normal camera and the photos after adding the macro lens, but I did notice the difference and it made myself look better in the photo. 

Going to stop here. Ciao~

"What this world needs is a new kind of army - the army of the kind."

~Cleveland Amory

Bemoan. Tantalizing. Cryptic.

"This is me. An ordinary teen that wish to be marvellous.

My name is Beh Tze Chyi, 16 going 17 next year. Someone who smiles a lot, laughs a lot. I blame a lot and curse a lot too.

But who cares, my bad temper drives out a lot of people, but it leaves the best ones behind. 

I love myself for being who I am."

That's how I described myself on the day 348th day of 2013 (based on Dayre's).

I copied this cos I have no words to describe myself, I don't know how to describe myself. 

And something I have to update here is, I was officially 17 years old 11 days before I start to write here. Before that, I got myself a new name, BRAYDEN. I want a name like this cos it's easier for people to recognise me and call me compared to "BEH TZE CHYI", don't you think? You can't pronounce it, isn't it? 

Sorry but true, I'm still bad tempered and always depressed. I don't know why and I'm working hard to change it. I want to be a 'cation' of this world, I don't want to spread my negative charges around. 

By the way, I grew up in a "Chinese" circumstances, so my English is not really good, I do a lot of grammar mistakes or maybe some vocabulary errors but please don't blame me for being dumb. However, any comments or guidances are always welcomed and appreciated. 

It has no point to introduce my school and the place I live right? 

Anyway, I'm living in a small town called Sungai Buloh that situated in Selangor of Malaysia. It's quite near to the capital city of Malaysia, Kuala Lumpur. :) 

And I'm studying in a lame yet interesting school, SMK Bandar Baru Sungai Buloh. It's not bad but just sometimes I got fed up for something. 

I do read some novels sometimes. I enjoy reading the non-fiction novels or maybe some meaningful poems, or anything that with abundance of emotions. I really enjoy it much cos sometimes it expresses my feelings that I don't know how to express.

And now, I would like to explain why I chose that three words for my blog title. 

Basically, I just wanted something that can represent my personalities. 

Did you noticed that "Bemoan. Tantalizing. Cryptic." started with alphabets "B", "T" and "C"? 

Yeah, it's my name. :) 

And why I chose those words?

BEMOAN

be·moan

biˈmōn/

verb

humorous

verb: bemoan; 3rd person present: bemoans; past tense: bemoaned; past participle:bemoaned; gerund or present participle: bemoaning

1. 1.

   express discontent or sorrow over (something).

Google explained everything. It's kinda like groaning and moaning. As I mentioned, I cursed a lot, but the word "curse" is not suitable for my blog title, I supposed? 

Just about any bad or annoying thing can be bemoaned. In fact, people love to bemoan how much other people are moaning and groaning about things!

TANTALIZING

tan·ta·lize

ˈtantlˌīz/

verb

gerund or present participle: tantalizing

1. 1.

   torment or tease (someone) with the sight or promise of something that is unobtainable.

   "such ambitious questions have long tantalized the world's best thinkers"

   • excite the senses or desires of (someone).

   
   

Yes, I tease a lot and I desiring of someone, maybe. 

When something is tantalizing, it makes you want it, even if it's totally out of reach. An exciting movie trailer could be tantalizing if it makes you want to see the movie. A little part of a song can be tantalizing if it tempts you to hear more. Smells — when they're good smells — can be very tantalizing. Just walking through a good restaurant, smelling and looking at the food, is a tantalizing experience.

CRYPTIC

cryp·tic

ˈkriptik/

adjective

adjective: cryptic

1. 1.

   having a meaning that is mysterious or obscure.

   "he found his boss's utterances too cryptic"

   
   

I might blog something mysterious or obscure, who knows? 

"White bunny. Moon. Square." Do you understand what that means? Of course not! It's totally cryptic. Cryptic comments or messages are hard to understand because they seem to have a hidden meaning.

I think I have to stop now, I've been crapping so much. Thanks for those who willing to finish this, I guess no one will though. It's a new start for me. 

"Live for yourself. Be the owner of your time."